You know that feeling when you think about your future and the panic paralizes you? I’ve been going through that very often lately. And today I read someone else’s thoughts about the same fear, of not knowing what will come.
Mine is related to a job. So was hers. And, just like her, I ask myself the same question: Is it worth spending a lifetime in a company that eventually eats your brain slowly? The only alternative I find is doing something that you love most, doing it with so much passion and dedication that, not only will it bring you money, but it will bring the fulfillness and happiness you’ve dreamed of.
The problem is that doing what you love most can be the hardest thing in the world. You’re afraid you might fail, you think: what if I can’t live off of this?, you find excuses – not enough money, no time for that yet, it is not going to work here and now.
There are two things that I would love to do in my life, and I’ve always been afraid to tell others about them. But then, maybe sharing them will help me take the first step. I have always wanted to write – and here I am trying, engaging on an endeavour that I don’t know if will succeed, for the first time just doing it for the sake of it. The second one is building a shelter for the poor and elderly and taking care of them – don’t know how, maybe fundraising, or paying for it with my own money; but then, how am I going to get the money and the social capital I need for this?
Coming in the US for the last three summers has changed my perspective over the concept of “career”. Can you call it a career if your hard work hasn’t helped others at all in a way or another, if nothing worthy has come out of it? What if it brings you money, but no joy or it hasn’t helped you grow as a human being or a professional? Working in Jackson has made me want to thrive for more than just a job, it’s made me want to be a better person, so that I can take the good out of what I do and share it with my family and friends, with the people I interact with. I am not just a front desk clerk, I am now a lucky person that gets to share the enthuziasm of travelling. And I hope I can share it on this blog too.
Having said all this, I can only end by saying that developing more curiosity, I’ve developed more passions. All of the sudden, I see PR as an intriguing combination of math, art and human interaction, I find myself loving interior decorations, artwork, hospitality industry. I appreciate nature and the presence of others. Is it just the charm of Jackson, or I am becoming a complex, mature person?